Monday, July 12, 2004
We finally got a yaya, but she's not that good yet. She seems nice enough though - came recommended by our friend who went home to Bacolod for a while. She's our friend's neighbor there, actually, so when they came back, they brought her along.

We still need to instruct her in the fine art of changing diapers, preparing milk, and lulling the little one to sleep. For now her duties are limited to doing the laundry, ironing, and carrying the baby.

I remember a line from Riding in Cars With Boys where one mom said, "if we actutally felt how much we loved our kids, it would kill us". How true. When I'm at work, I can't bear the thought of not being with Dan, looking at his picture on my workstation. Lyn bought a nursery rhyme audio cassette for him that features this song that struck a nerve:

Listening and learning
With fun games to play and sing
I am learning everyday when i sing along and play
songs that help me think and learn and grow

Learning and listening
To songs that are fun to sing
There's so much to do and see
Come and sing along with me
Music helps me learn things, I should know
Now watch me grow

*Instrumental*

The masters of classroom songs
Chopin, Beethoven, Mozart, Gogh
My IQ is on the rise, with nursery rhymes and lullabyes
The great composers help my mind to grow

Listening and learning
With fun games to play and sing Iam learning everyday
When i sing along and play
Songs that help me think and learn and grow
Now watch me grow


The "watch me grow" part really pulled some heart strings. I felt as if Dan was singing the song to me. He's such a fragile little work of art; holding him in my arms triggers this side of me I never knew existed, or wasn't there before. I see a bit of myself in him, and see a bit of myself in my father at the same time. In my young life, this is such a strange revelation. I tried to anticipate all the cliches that come with fatherhood, but you honestly never know what it's like until you're there. Never.

So with that, I bid farewell for now: many emails to answer, and some other tasks to attend to.

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